$ In God We Trust $
As Lauryn Hill prepares for her prison stint for allegedly not shelling out her IRS debts, we bury Chris Kelly, the 34 year old half of the multi-selling act Kriss Kross. Now if anybody should be going to prison, it SHOULD be the pervert(s) who exploited those young little boys back in the day, by zooming in on their butts, complete with easy-to-unzip zipper situated on the back of their asses (YUCK!!). And from what I’ve been reading on the web, yeah, the backwards clothing was DEFINITELY symbolic for what allegedly transpired in real life (RIP Chris) (GROSS!!!). But, we here in the US of A, know all too well what really goes down. Take Stephanie Bongiovi for example. Just a few months ago, the daughter of Jon Bon Jovi overdosed on heroin (I mean, it’s gotta be rough being a rich, privileged, blonde haired, blue eyed daughter of a rock star who never has to take out a student loan to get through college). Now prior to her overdosing, countless other young people have overdosed on heroin, and no one really cared. But when you’re rich, white, famous daddy can pull some strings with food addict Chris Christie, then laws get passed IMMEDIATELY so YOU don’t have to go to jail. Once again, God Bless America. Amen.