The Church of Tell It Like It Is

Archive for January, 2015

The “Christian” Comedy Alliance

So, recently a bunch of cartoonists in Europe were mercilessly slaughtered for poking fun at religion. Horrible, right? Gross. But today, I came across some of the BEST and probably unintentional (or maybe COMPLETELY INTENTIONAL) pieces of satire I’ve read in quite some time. Some guy most people have never heard of until now (of course) wrote some article about the “gay agenda” (too funny!) that is being “crammed” down our throats via television – and no, this writer wasn’t even referring to the “Bill Clinton hanging out with the pedophile thing” either (talk about AGENDA – wish good ol’ Hillbilly Clinton would get some sex-addiction therapy QUICKLY ! but…we know…we know….HE “doesn’t” have a “problem” – that’s just the way THEM good ol’ boys are! Yeee Ha!). (Insert Banjo Music) But I digress…..So this “Christian” writer talks of the…get ready now….”EVILS” (lol!) of Ellen DeGeneres and her “GAY AGENDA” and lists the ALTERNATIVES to that “evil”. Here are two that made the “Christian” “alternatives to evil” (lol!) list:

1) Gunsmoke : a 1950’s/1960-ish television show whereby one of the main characters is a PROSTITUTE/MADAM who “services” (wink wink) married men or unmarried men (gotta SOW THOSE WILD OATS BOYS! YEE HA!).  Evil Agenda? “Hey all you horny cowboys who can’t control your dick – while your sperm-dumping- receptacle (aka “fruitful vine”, “wife”) is home cooking and cleaning and minding your offspring, you can pleasure yourselves with a few drinks at the saloon and then receive a nice “happy ending” with one of our whores upstairs.”  Now that’s some “Christian” Family Entertainment right there!  (PS – in real life the lady who played the main Madam/Prostitute character died of AIDS having been MARRIED to a man who was GAY (yup!).)

and

2) The Fugitive: Really? Jesus promoted cigarette smoking and revenge?

God Bless America. And so it is. Amen.

Amanda Blake "Gunsmoke" Kitty Russell

 

Still of David Janssen in The Fugitive (1963)

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Stuck in Adolescence Forever

Oh Boo Hoo…… Emotionally trapped-in-the-1980’s, Guns-N-Roses guitarist Slash and his soon-to-be ex-wife are getting a divorce. Could her boobs look any more ridiculous? Proportion distortion is her calling card (I guess)….that’s what keeps males who are trapped in infancy and the seventh grade mind set interested (“duh!!! BIG BOOBS! Can’t wait to blow a load!”)…even if the males ARE WELL OVER AGE 45.  And to top it off, while kids are starving in Syria, these high school drop out, alcoholic morons, “boobs are my LIFE!” types REPRODUCED (nice! more fuck-ups coming down the pike in the next 20 years!)….and….have millions to fight over. Yippie! God Bless America. Amen.

 

 

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